What is a Memoir?
A memoir is an a blend of real and imaginary, a story that reads like fiction but one that is real, based on real happenings, feelings, and people. Because a memoir is about “the truth,” it carries a certain weight. Your readers will throw themselves into the story in a powerful way because they identify with the real people that are the “characters” in a memoir. We identify with characters in fiction, too, and we also learn from them, but it’s not the same as it is in memoir. In a fictional story, we enter what John Gardner calls “The Fictive Dream,” where we are immersed totally in that world and don’t want to leave. Have you ever stayed up late reading a novel you couldn’t put down? That is being lost in the fictive dream! The same thing happens in a well-written memoir—we’re immersed in the world of the story and we don’t want to leave. We feel that we are learning from the author about aspects of life that are important lessons, a story about how we learn, stumble, make mistakes, and imperfectly grow and heal. Memoirs might be seen as present-day spiritual quests. Mark Matousek, author of Sex, Death, and Enlightenment and The Boy He Left Behind, says, “All memoirs are really a spiritual journey.”
Why Write a Memoir?
Beginning a memoir project is like being an explorer of new territory, an anthropologist, a psychologist, and a sky diver all at once—you take risks on the journey, but the journey is your challenge, a way to stretch yourself and to grow as a creative person. It gets your heart beating and draws upon your passion and the unique creative being that you are.
Writing a memoir—a story that is true—gives meaning to your life and connects you to the past and the present. It draws upon your dreams, imagination, and research skills. It hones your ability to use language and to express yourself. You might think of writing a memoir as a journey into self and soul, a means of change and transformation. Memoir writers express that they are changed by the experience for the better.
Let’s look at the reasons you might want to write a memoir, and how writing a memoir can change your life—for the better.
- Writing a memoir—a story that is true—gives meaning to your life and connects you to the past and the present.
- It draws upon your dreams, your imagination, and your research skills.
- It hones your ability to use language and to express yourself.
- Memoir gives more back to you than you put in—like magic, or like a garden.
- Writing a memoir is a transformational and spiritual path.
- Your story can change others’ lives . . . and your own.
- Research proves that writing heals both body and mind.
- Creating a narrative where you are the first-person narrator integrates the past and the present.
- Remembering brings all parts of you together again.
- Writing with your own voice is empowering, and it continues to empower, story by story.
- Telling your truths frees you from shame and guilt. Why do you want to write your memoir?
What special knowledge do you have that you want to convey to others? Write a paragraph about this.
Who could benefit from what you know? List themes, audiences, and people you know who could learn from you.
Linda Joy,
This post is an excellent overview of how memoir writing is a “spiritual journey.” I was nodding, “yes” throughout the whole piece. I’m excited to feature you next week as a guest on my blog and am looking forward to learning more about this spiritual journey I’ve been on with you over the past almost- three years! Thsnk you.
Excellent post, Linda Joy! You make so many important points. I wonder what additional reasons you might add for not only writing a memoir but writing a memoir in community. Based on my experiences in your writing to heal classes, community has played such an important role in my healing journey. I’m learning that community does not necessarily have to be a group that meets at a certain time, but even sharing our writing with one other person potentially makes such a difference–in his/her life and in ours!
Mary, it’s true that part of what helps to help and create important shifts is being witnessed by others. I will be talking about that more in another post! We need to seen and understood, and writing helps to create that at a higher level. We come to understand ourselves better, and with the excellent “listening” skills of our readers and their responses, we feel seen, we feel that we are not so alone.
Thank you for adding to the conversation!
Kathy–you know about this journey! You know every rock, chasm, waterfall, and boulder on the path! I’m so pleased to be with you next week–there is so much to say about the journey of memoir–a spiritual, life-changing journey into the unknown, where it turns out we become known–to ourselves, and with others. See you over on your blog soon! Everyone needs to check out your blog: http://krpooler.com
Hi Linda Joy,
Loved this post. I have learned so much through your exceptional mentoring.
I would be honored to have you guest post on my blog site anytime you can find the time.
Thank you, dawn
Hi Dawn–thank you so much for your comments. Congratulations on your blog, memoir, and continuing passion to learn and share! I will be visiting you one of these days soon–on your blog.