Memories and Memoirs Newsletter | December 2009

little Tree
little tree
little silent Christmas tree
you are so little
you are more like a flower

who found you in the green forest
and were you very sorry to come away?
see i will comfort you
because you smell so sweetly

i will kiss your cool bark
and hug you safe and tight
just as your mother would,
only don't be afraid

look the spangles
that sleep all the year in a dark box
dreaming of being taken out and allowed to shine,
the balls the chains red and gold the fluffy threads,

put up your little arms
and i'll give them all to you to hold
every finger shall have its ring
and there won't a single place dark or unhappy

then when you're quite dressed
you'll stand in the window for everyone to see
and how they'll stare!
oh but you'll be very proud

and my little sister and i will take hands
and looking up at our beautiful.
we'll dance and sing
'noel noel'

-- e. e. Cummings

This is my favorite poem about Christmas! It reads like a "true" story, a memoir poem perhaps. Enjoy! -- Linda Joy

Welcome to all memoir writers, poets, and lovers of literature! This is the last newsletter of 2009--where did the year go??

November was an exciting month for me--my review for Mary Karr's Lit was accepted by Story Circle Book Reviews and was awarded book review of the month! And even more fun, I attended Mary's reading at Book Passage and got my picture taken with her! She has so much wisdom to share about memoir writing and her own passage of self-development through authoring three memoirs.

I recommend reading Mary Karr's memoirs for:

In January I'm continuing to offer the mini-workshop series through NAMW to help writers develop their skills. These have been fun for me and for those who join us, as we all connect and talk about our challenges, issues that memoir writers try to resolve, and possible solutions that help keep the words flowing. It means a lot to me to teach memoir writers the emotional and writerly skills that help them reach their goals. Please visit us at www.namw.org to see new workshop and class offerings.

Holiday Memories

The holidays can be times of deep emotion--everyone is “supposed” to be happy but sometimes ancient conflicts burst out, and old unresolved issues arise for another round of discussion. For memoir writers, you can use these moments to develop a sense of objectivity in the face of family drama--think of it as research. When you have time, take note of the particulars in the family dynamics, how family members talk, the cadence of dialogue. What are the sources of the ancient conflicts? Who is the most positive person in the family? Is there a scapegoat, and why?

For many writers, memories of the past can be hard to uncover until the person finds herself in the same setting, visiting the home town, or sitting in a living room that evokes times gone by. When you visit a place where you grew up or spent a lot of time in the past, be prepared to capture new memories as they arise. Keep your journal handy, and pen at hand. Just don't tell everyone you are writing a memoir, or they might clam up or harass you about what you are putting in it! Nothing riles up a family like a memoirist in their midst!

Many families have rituals that carry meaning, such as tree trimming, choosing new ornaments, Hanukkah candles and latke parties. Each of these rituals have deep and enduring emotional significance, and it can be helpful to capture scenes from the past using scenes from the present as your jumping off point, a memory trigger.

Holidays can be a focal point for our memories, hopes and dreams. Thinking about holidays in the past can help you deepen your understanding of your family.

Reflect upon your holiday memories, and discover what meaning you find in them now.

Writing Prompts

  1. Describe your childhood home during the holidays--how was it decorated? How did your neighborhood, town, or city look during the holidays?
  2. Was there another favorite house or home that you enjoyed during the holidays? Write with  sensual details--color, sound, smell, and taste.
  3. What is one of your favorite photographs from a holiday? Describe what is in the photograph, and write about why it's your favorite.
  4. Write about your favorite holiday food, recipe, or story that you associate with holiday rituals--cookie baking, special cakes, or any ritual food that has meaning to you.
  5. What was your most wished for Christmas or Chanukah present? Did you receive it? Write about your feelings.
  6. Write about past holidays--were they happy or sad for you? What did your family do to celebrate?
  7. Is there a New Year's celebration you remember best? How old were you, and where did you celebrate?
  8. What rituals do you bring from past holidays into your celebrations now?

The San Francisco Writing conference

I attended two events that focused on the writing community in the San Francisco Bay Area. The first one presented by the Women's National Book Association celebrated National Book Group month by showcasing three writers who talked about their writing and research process and read from their work. There's nothing quite as stimulating and pleasurable as learning from other authors! And, there was champagne, strawberries and all kinds of great food. As always with a group of writers, everyone talks about what they are working on and buying up books! This event took place at Book Passage in Corte Madera, CA, north of San Francisco, a popular gathering place for writers.

On Saturday, I attended the Redwood Writers Conference in Santa Rosa, California. The Redwood Branch of the California Writers Club which is celebrating its centennial this year, put on a wonderful one day conference that offered not only great food and desserts, but a variety of presenters and workshop leaders--including one of our favorites--Jordan Rosenfeld, who taught our NAMW teleseminar on Scenes last month. Tamim Ansary, author of West of Kabul, East of New York, gave the keynote address and a workshop. There led the crowded room in a free flowing discussion about the different issues that come up for memoir writers--from family reactions to telling the truth. When asked if we had to stick to the truth in memoir even when it's not convenient his answer was a resounding, "Yes!"

He said this about memoir: "A memoir is a constructed view of reality," and urged us to see writing a memoir as a quest, as a journey. "Life's journey has a natural arc, so the story of our life has that shape." Tamim urged us to listen to our inner selves in order to glean the meaning out of our experiences, and to understand that writing the memoir is the way we learn about who we are. I was inspired by him, and by Adair Lara, who wrote a personal essay column in the San Francisco Chronicle for thirteen years. She taught us how to focus on in one particular point
of change as a way to create personal essays.

The best part of a conference, other than the learning and the good food, are all the new connections and networking with other writers. It's inspiring to sit in a room with over 150 people who do what you do every day--sit alone and write! I look forward to getting to know some new friends and continuing to share writing ideas and process with old ones. Here at NAMW, we strive to inspire you and help you with your networking, as well as present excellent learning opportunities. The important thing is to keep writing! But add to your list attending conferences, author readings, and your own reading. Each stimulating event feeds your writing life.

Upcoming Events and Workshops:

[2010 Winter workshops] Writing a Healing/Spiritual Memoir sessions with Linda Joy Myers

In this class each student writes the vignettes that are important to the story that needs to be told. We begin with turning point stories, stories that are most significant on the timeline, and write those first. My suggestion is to go with the “fire in the belly” approach—what is there that is commanding your attention.

We frequently discuss and try to disable the power of the inner critic that blocks us from writing in the fullness of our feelings. Some writers in the class are beginning, others have written for a while, and each person is on a quest to find the meaningful stories that are part of their spiritual journey.

Below is our current schedule for the 2010 Winter workshops for Writing a Healing/Spiritual Memoir sessions with Linda Joy Myers. Each workshop period consists of 10 sessions.

January 11 - March 15, 2010 [Introductory class]
Mondays, 11 AM PST
Fee: $425.00

January 8 - March 12, 2010 [Advanced class]
Fridays, 8 AM PST
*9 sessions for this class
Fee: $410.00

Click here to learn more.

NAMW Teleseminar January 22, 2010 with Michael Larsen and Elizabeth Pomada

Agents and Memoir Writers--Who, What, When, Why, and How
Date: January 22, 2010
Guest Speakers: Michael Larsen and Elizabeth Pomada
Times: 11 am Pacific | 12 noon Mountain | 1 pm Central | 2 pm Eastern
Cost: Free for NAMW Members
Become A Member of NAMW Today to take part in this teleseminar!

Please join Michael Larsen and Elizabeth Pomada from the Larsen-Pomada Literary Agency as they talk about what memoir writers need to know with Linda Joy Myers. They will discuss the role of the literary agent, publishing realities, and how you can shape your writing life so you will be ready for what the agents need to help make you a successful published author. [Read more]

Stories from the Heart V

Story Circle Network
Fifth National Women's Memoir Conference
February 5-7, 2010
Wyndham Hotel, Austin, Texas

Stories from the Heart V will bring women from around the country to celebrate our stories and our lives. Through writing, reading, listening, and sharing, we will discover how personal narrative is a healing art, how we can gather our memories, how we can tell our stories. We welcome readers, writers, storytellers, and any woman with a past, present, and future. There will be opportunities to explore difficult or hidden issues, expand our relationships with other women, and discover different modes and media--such as art, dance, and drama--for sharing our stories. Come, learn, share, celebrate with us as we honor our stories! Click here to learn more.

Rabindranath Tagore: Trees are the earth's endless effort to speak to the listening heaven.

"What would happen if one woman told the truth about her life?
The world would split open."

Muriel Rukeyser